Uncomfortable Plot Summaries

[José]

Résumés politiquement incorrects de films et séries :

  Citation

Uncomfortable Plot Summaries

[…]

300: Gays kill blacks.

[…]

ALIEN: Ship fails to deliver cargo, crew don’t get bonus.

[…]

ATLAS SHRUGGED: Selfish industrialist destroys economy.

[…]

BATMAN: Wealthy man assaults the mentally ill.

BEAUTY AND THE BEAST: Peasant girl develops Stockholm Syndrome.

[…]

BLADE: Obsessed loner stalks minority group.

BLADE RUNNER: Man with no apparent skill stumbles into escaped robots, fails to kill most, fucks one.

[…]

BREAKFAST AT TIFFANY’S: Pretty redneck girl fools socialites, flirts with gay gigolo.

[…]

CHARLIE AND THE CHOCOLATE FACTORY: Deranged pedophile big-business industrialist tortures and mutilates young children.

[…]

CONAN THE BARBARIAN: Petty thief murders religious leader.

[…]

DELIVERANCE: Tourists experience local hospitality.

[…]

DIE HARD: Dysfunctional cop saves marriage by murdering foreign national.

[…]

DRACULA: Immigrant clashes with locals.

[…]

GLADIATOR: Convict murders head of state.

[…]

HIGHLANDER: Elderly immigrant destroys property.

[…]

JFK: Family man wastes life for nothing in crusade against homosexuals.

[…]

KARATE KID: Boy gains acceptance through violence.

[…]

OCEAN’S ELEVEN: Gang of career criminals commit act of terror to facilitate robbery and romance.

[…]

PREDATOR: American military-industrial complex ruins first contact with alien life.

[…]

RAMBO III: The United States provides arms, equipment and training to the terrorists behind 9/11.

[…]

ROBOCOP: Female officer’s incompetence leads partner to be murdered and enslaved by corporation.

ROCKY: White man beats black man.

[…]

SCARFACE: Immigrant finds running his own business stressful, dangerous.

[…]

SILENCE OF THE LAMBS: Incompetent manipulated by several murderers, stumbles upon suspect completely by accident. Creates situation that allows serial killer to escape.

[…]

THE MATRIX: Hacker is given perfect justification for mass slaughter.

[…]

THE X-MEN: Minority group seeks overthrow of social order.

[…]

http://www.postmodernbarney.com/2009/04/un…plot-summaries/

[Skeggjöld]

  Citation

IRON MAN: Alcoholic rich white man with technology fetish goes vigilante.

KILL BILL: Irresponsible mother wants custody of her child.

MONTY PYTHON AND THE HOLY GRAIL: British comedy troupe inadvertently creates language lab for nerds.

ROCKY: White man beats black man.

V FOR VENDETTA: Dystopian government overthrown by faceless conformity.

WATCHMEN: Homosexual destroys New York, blames God.

[h16]

  Citation

SWEENEY TODD: Businesses flourish when freed from stringent regulation.

Joli.

[A.B.]

LORD OF THE RINGS: Midget destroys stolen property

[G7H+]

Every Bond movie: Psychopathic civil servant kills entrepreneur and staff

[Sous-Commandant Marco]

Star Wars: siblings of a dysfunctional family team up with a religious terrorist group, rebel against their father, a disabled veteran and a honest civil servant, and create unrest against a democratically elected government.

[Drake]

??? : A sour community leader fight with the authorities about emigration laws by spreding plagues among innocent people.

[neuneu2k]

  Drake a dit :

??? : A sour community leader fight with the authorities about emigration laws by spreding plagues among innocent people.

Facile, c'est les dix commandements.

[Drake]

  neuneu2k a dit :

Facile, c'est les dix commandements.

Oui, super-fastoche, mais c'était juste pour amorcer la pompe.

[Sous-Commandant Marco]

Exodus: a religious community bribes authorities and resorts to terrorism in order to illegally immigrate into a peaceful land and ultimately control it.

[Randian shithead]

??? : influential spiritual leader entertains relationship with nazi officer.

[Drake]

  Sous-Commandant Marco a dit :

Exodus: a religious community bribes authorities and resorts to terrorism in order to illegally immigrate into a peaceful land and ultimately control it.

Je trouvais plus fun de laisser deviner le titre du film. Mais venant de SCM, je comprends le choix de l'oeuvre

  Randian shithead a dit :

??? : influential spiritual leader entertains relationship with nazi officer.

Ce film fait-il référence à une secte gnostique implantée sur les hauts-plateaux himalayens?

[Randian shithead]

  Drake a dit :

Ce film fait-il référence à une secte gnostique implantée sur les hauts-plateaux himalayens?

uhuh, oui

[Sous-Commandant Marco]

  Randian shithead a dit :

??? : influential spiritual leader entertains relationship with nazi officer.

Valkyrie?

??: a woman finds true love through zoophilia.

[José]

  Sous-Commandant Marco a dit :

??: a woman finds true love through zoophilia.

Belle And The Beast. Disneyland®

[Drake]

  Sous-Commandant Marco a dit :

??: a woman finds true love through zoophilia.

Max mon amour http://www.cinemovies.fr/fiche_film.php?IDfilm=4034

Alien

[Randian shithead]

  Sous-Commandant Marco a dit :

Valkyrie?

non (Drake a trouvé je pense)

[Sous-Commandant Marco]

  Lucilio a dit :

Belle And The Beast. Disneyland®

Pas loin mais ce n'est pas celui auquel je pensais. D'autres propositions?

Et sinon quelques autres, plus faciles:

??: journalists of liberal media makes a decent conservative leader resign because he is not able to use modern tape technology.

??: rich white boy annoys soldiers with stupid philosophic remarks, causing them to die and ultimately his country to lose the war.

[Randian shithead]

??? : young girl lives enriching experiences through teen pregnancy.

  Sous-Commandant Marco a dit :

??: rich white boy annoys soldiers with stupid philosophic remarks, causing them to die and ultimately his country to lose the war.

Apocalypse Now ?

[Sous-Commandant Marco]

  Drake a dit :

Max mon amour http://www.cinemovies.fr/fiche_film.php?IDfilm=4034

Alien

Pas mal mais en fait c'est King Kong. En y réfléchissant, j'aurais dû mettre: "a woman finds the perfect lover but he gets killed by the US army".

[José]

  Sous-Commandant Marco a dit :

Pas mal mais en fait c'est King Kong.

Ah… J'avais pensé à Jaffa.

[Sous-Commandant Marco]

  Randian shithead a dit :

[…] Apocalypse Now ?

Je pensais à Platoon mais ce n'est pas mal. Pour Apocalypse Now, j'aurais mis: "The US Army hires a killer to get rid of a veteran officer turned antiwar leader".

[Drake]

  Sous-Commandant Marco a dit :

Pas mal mais en fait c'est King Kong. En y réfléchissant, j'aurais dû mettre: "a woman finds the perfect lover but he gets killed by the US army".

  Randian shithead a dit :

non (Drake a trouvé je pense)

Sept ans au Tibet. Cela me fait penser qu'il faut que je réponse à Free Jazz sur le fil consacré au bouddhisme, mais avant je veux finir de lire :

[Etienne]

  Randian shithead a dit :

??? : young girl lives enriching experiences through teen pregnancy.

Juno.

[Sous-Commandant Marco]

??: a massive and brutal US and British military operation kills thousands of people on the beaches of Normandy and derails an early version of the European Union.

??: an incompetent black cop is unable to stop a vicious serial killer until he finally murders the young wife of his white colleague.

[Etienne]

  Sous-Commandant Marco a dit :

??: a massive and brutal US and British military operation kills thousands of people on the beaches of Normandy and derails an early version of the European Union.

Saving Private Ryan. Facile.

[José]

  Etienne a dit :

Saving Private Ryan. Facile.

No, The Longest Day.

[Etienne]

  Lucilio a dit :

No, The Longest Day.

Oui, bon, hein, c'est sur le même thème.

[Randian shithead]

  Sous-Commandant Marco a dit :

??: an incompetent black cop is unable to stop a vicious serial killer until he finally murders the young wife of his white colleague.

se7en ? je suis plus sûr du plot.

[Sous-Commandant Marco]

??: because they don't speak the language and don't understand the local customs, a bunch of American outlaws and mercenaries wreaks havoc in a poor village of a third-world country.

??: a young woman has her head turned around by a nice talking gambler and shows indifference to the death of hundreds of people as she escapes a ship wreckage.

  Randian shithead a dit :

se7en ? je suis plus sûr du plot.

Oui.